Bug Appetit!

Like the 17-year cicadas, I’m emerging from my little hole in the ground to blog once more. It’s been a wild month—spent a week in Indiana, got chased by a tornado, got food poisoning. Then, I spent this week locked in a hotel for our national users conference, being incredibly perky and accommodating. It can take a lot out of a girl!

While I was in Indiana, the beginning of the cicada hullabaloo…bugs that come out once every 17 years are suddenly celebrities, with everyone and their buggy sisters and brothers coming out of the woodwork about how wonderful this event is, etc., etc., etc…Not that I have anything against bugs in general—I’m the girl who fishes spiders out of our pool because I like (nay LOVE) bugs that eat other bugs!—but give me a break about the wonder of it all!

I think what broke my camel’s back is this article about cooking cicadas. Personally, I think I’d have to be pretty damn hungry to actually eat a cicada, much less any other bug. Not that I’m not willing to try new things, as those of you who know me—deep fried bacon, anyone?—but I can safely draw my line in the sand on cicadas. Besides, can you really find something that looks like this appetizing?

In the Things I Wish I Didn’t Know About (but now that I do, I can't Stop Craving Them) Department , we have the Hand-spun Milkshake at Chick-fil-a. I know, I know, these things have been out for quite some time, but I had successfully resisted trying one until a couple of weekends ago when The Man mentioned that the chocolate shake is OMG good. So, I broke down and went to the dark side and had one. And, he’s right. (Look, honey, I said you were right! In Print! And on the Innernets, no less!) Not too sweet, just chocolatey enough, and you get whipped cream and a cherry.

Chocolate shakes rank high on my list of comfort foods, and the perfect thing, IMHO, to pair a chocolate shake with is a cheeseburger and fries. You’ve got it all with that meal—sweet, salty, fat, cheesy, crunchy, chocolate—perfection! My current fave cheeseburger is at a little joint called 5 Guys Famous Burgers and Fries. This little chain recently moved to our area, and we’ve become regulars much to my waistline’s chagrin. (Weight Watchers? What Weight Watchers? I don’t need no stinkin’ Weight Watchers! I’m watching my weight just fine! Watching it crawl up the scale!)

5 Guys has a very simple menu—burgers, hot dogs, and fries—and simple is how they like it. No frills, just good food. And, the fries are fantastic! Remember when I wrote about “tater day” in class, and how Chef told us to par cook the fries in oil, drain them, and then just before service, plop them back in the oil to finish and crisp? Yeah, they do that with spectacular results.

You’re probably thinking, “it’s just fries,” but with all the hoopla about how fat we are, how unhealthy our diet is, blah, blah, blah, you realize that life’s too short to eat bad “bad” food. So, if I’m going to actually break down and eat fries, I want the best damn fries possible. And the ones at 5 Guys are pretty damn good.

The one major thing missing from the 5 Guys menu is a chocolate shake. I just think that would kick this All-American meal right over the edge. So, I think that the next time we go to 5 Guys, I’m going to make a clandestine run to Chick-fil-a first and smuggle a chocolate shake in my purse. Then, my burger nirvana will be complete...

(Beautiful! Just Beautiful! A real work of Art!)

Have a great Memorial Day weekend, and cook something good!